Hellooooo Nurse!

So yesterday, SIL and I went to get a massage. We went to this local shop that, from the outside, makes you think, "$5 me sucky sucky." Seriously, it's in a strip mall, on the side that you would really have to know about it to find it. Location, location, location. We walk in and, of course, a little Asian woman walks up and greats us. The decor is nice inside, but still gives you the vibe of bow chicka bow wow.


So Fook Mi shows us to our rooms. Very tranquil feeling for me, now. I'm a certified massage therapist, so I know what I want. Fook Mi takes on SIL and Fook Yu comes into my room. I can no longer vouch for what happens with SIL, but here's what happened with me. Shit gets interesting.


Fook Yu puts on some music that I can not understand, but the beat is nice. Holy fucking shit, here comes that voice in my head saying "You're about to get yours!" but it's in the run for your fucking life tone instead of the yeah, baby tone. At this point in time I'm just laying there under that sheet in all my goth glory hoping I don't have to go all Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon on miss thang. Then it starts...


Mama-san put me in drool inducing sleep in a heart beat. She stretched my back, kneaded my muscles, and did me right in the right way. I didn't realize how many knots I had in my back until she hopped up on the table with me, straddled me, and put an elbow right into my shoulder. Oh my fucking GAWD! I am fucking jello now. Then things get crazy.


Fook Yu Right starts working on my arse. Yep, she pulls that sheet down and digs in full force. Let me say that at first I was thinking 'It's fucking COLD!" then I was quickly taken to "Oh shit!" state. Now weather this was the plan or not, it fucking happened. She is kneading and rolling, massaging and stretching my lower back and arse so good my fucking toes curled, I saw in full HD technicolor, and... Soaked the fucking sheets. Not even fucking kidding here, Minions. It. Was. EPIC.


As I'm laying there thinking "This never fucking happened before" she keeps working on me, moves to my legs, and doesn't even seem to care. She gets warm towels and lays one on my back and starts to clean off the oil, then my legs. She has me roll over which, at this point, I'm thinking "Yes ma'am!" She massages my arms, hands, quads, and scalp. When she finishes she quietly says she's finished and walks out. I lay there for a minute not wanting to move but reluctantly get up ad get dressed. I look back and all I can think is Mama-san did me fucking right! All without the actual sucky sucky, licky licky part.


Bills gets paid and tips are giving and we head back to my house, but first, we need food. Hey, I get hungry after happy endings. Teriyaki, here we come!


~Hekate